Counting the Cost over Sexual Sin

Taken from

The Game Plan: The Men's 30-Day Strategy for Attaining Sexual Integrity

By Joe Dallas

No matter what behavior it is you're turning from...


1. Name the "benefits" you've been getting from your sexual sin---that is, what you've been getting out of this behavior. This is a way of counting the cost involved in giving it up. There are usually several "benefits"; here are some of the most common:

• It comforts me
• I get affection from this
• I get affirmation from this
• It kills my pain
• I feel an emotional connection.
• It's exciting.
• It makes me feel powerful.
• It distracts me when I'm bored.

If any of these apply, list them. But also ask yourself: "What else have I been getting out of this?"


2. What will your life be like five years from now if you don't turn away from this behavior? Specifically, what will your frame of mind be like, what will your marriage be like, what will your spiritual life be like, and what impact will this behavior have on your job, career, ministry, and reputation five years from now, if current trends continue?

Rationale

By counting the cost of giving up this behavior, then weighing its benefits against its liabilities, you make a reasoned commitment to both reject it and abstain from it.

Prayer

Lord, in leaving this behavior or relationship, I feel as though I'm walking away from an old, reliable friend. This sin has offended and grieved You, and it has damaged me and all I hold dear. But it has been a part of me so long I feel, even as I reject it, that I'm cutting off a part of myself. Help me to see sin for what it is, in all its horribleness, and keep me from being dazzled by its memory and attractiveness in the future.

Three things I need from You if I'm to follow You in this way:

1. I need Your strength and courage to follow through on the commitment I'm making today.
2. I need Your wisdom as I deal with the specifics and details involved in turning from this behavior.
3. I need deeper faith in You and in Your ability to keep me from returning to the very thing I'm now rejecting.

Please help me to be the good and faithful servant You've called me to be by giving me all three. I ask this in Jesus's name. Amen.