Wednesday, October 29, 2014

Retreating Into a Fantasy World

If you're anything like me, you know how easy it is to escape into a fantasy world; one that brings instant comfort, relief, and pleasure.  It could be through the means of pornography, masturbation, or fantasizing.

In this post, I want us to delve deeper into what fuels this cycle and list its benefits and downside.

What fuels the need to escape into a fantasy world?

  • A broken heart
  • Loneliness
  • The desire to be wanted, respected, treasured, admired, fawned over, and idolized
  • Arousal
  • Boredom
  • Insecurity
  • Feeling slighted
  • Loss of a relationship or friend that was important to us
  • Feeling underappreciated or not acknowledged
  • Mixed up thoughts and emotions we have difficulty expressing
  • Jealousy of others
  • Too much responsibility
  • Loss of a job
  • Perceived or real rejection

...and a myriad of other emotions or raw ways of feeling that we want immediate relief from.

What are the benefits to fantasy, masturbation, porn, etc.?

  • The ability to imagine ourselves with whoever we want and in doing so, we are always the one pursued, the sex is always incredible, we perform well sexually, and everyone fawns over us or hails us as worthwhile and attractive

  • Pleasurable thoughts consume us and have a calming effect, causing us to long for the instant gratification porn, masturbation, fantasy, or visiting strip clubs offers (there's such a thing as closing our eyes in the midst of having a lap dance and thinking really raunchy thoughts while picturing whom we please during this quick act)

  • Hours can be spent catering to our ego, falsely fulfilling our need for respect and closeness with another person, all in the comfort of our own homes or at the office when no one is around...except for pixels on a screen and our hand (seems foolish, doesn't it?  Yeah you can get off, but in reality, you got yourself off to images on a screen of men and women you will never be with and who don't even know you personally.  It's a mirage to believe these people want, admire, respect, and adore us.  It's an illusion.  A brilliant scheme.  A pathetic lie.  An untrue and therefore sad reality to face)

The downside of retreating to a (fake), unrealistic fantasy world

  • Each of us has the ability to become a twisted, perverse, unclean, unsafe predator in our thinking, which makes letting our thoughts run rampant a dangerous practice

  • Masturbation feels good.  It does.  But, if self-gratification is your form of release from watching porn or thinking impure thoughts and it no longer satisfies you, what do you suppose will be the next choice?  An escort?  Visiting a strip club twice (or five) times a week?  Meeting people at bars and having a one night stand?  Harming a child?  Sin will always take more from us than we want to give.  Timothy Keller has said, "Sin isn't done with you when you are done with it."  Where will your secret sins or fantasy lead you?  Do you really want to wait and find out once it's too late and the damage is already done; not only to yourself on a number of levels but also to others (whomever that may entail)?  RUN (Genesis 39: 12 - read full chapter for context).  Turn from sin like you are avoiding the plague.  Why risk your life by walking as close to the cliff of sin as possible before falling to your death and then experiencing the obliteration of your well-being and all that is still right in your life?

  • Fantasy and porn are fake.  Fantasy is making our own porn.  We can have as many people as we want, painted shamelessly on the canvas of our debauched minds and can experience anything and everything in our thoughts where we are always the hero, always the prize, always the star.  Porn is airbrushed, distorted, practiced, and unrealistic.  I believe people love pornography because it is the perfect dream.  Note: Dreams aren't reality.  A mirage, an illusion, the exposure and degradation of other human beings for our own momentary enjoyment.

"Lust leads to lonely isolation, which is ironic since its false promise is total fulfillment."  Jonathan Daugherty

"Pornography removes the need for true intimacy & destroys the root of what sexual closeness is meant to be.  ...What one reaps from porn & sexual immorality is brokenness, insecurity, & an insatiable hunger for carnality.  FLEE from it!"  Mike Jones

"We need to be encouraging a purity that looks toward the long-term instead of one that lives in fear of immediate consequences."  Jessica Harris

"Building a life of purity is a lifelong project, one that requires a complementary tearing down and building up."  Jonathan Daugherty

Philippians 4: 8

"How sweet the name of Jesus sounds in a believer's ear. It soothes his sorrow, heals his wounds, and drives away his fears." John Newton


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