Sunday, July 20, 2014

What Fantasy Produces

Recently, I wrote about fantasy and its effects on us even into the future.  I wanted to further address this topic because I believe it is important.
Maybe fantasizing is a form of comfort to you when stressed or overwhelmed.  Or possibly it's an escape from the harsh reality you call "life".  Let's examine what fantasy is exactly and see if it is a worthwhile form of comfort worth clinging to and if it will profit us most in the long-run.
Fantasy is fueled by more than a lustful desire for sex.  We add fuel to the fire of our fantasies through visual entertainment like pornography, music videos, and even reality TV shows where we gather images and scenes of what we find appealing and what is arousing to us.
If fantasy can be boiled down to mere sensual thoughts, one might ask what the problem is.  The reality is though that impure thoughts do not just stay thoughts.  They will require more.  They become manifested in the form of acting out through engaging in self-gratification or further exposure to porn.
...Consuming pornography and masturbating to it leads to addiction and obsession.  It distorts our view of what is attractive and soon we can only get off to hyper sexualized images and perfect sex scenes with viewing a variety of partners on film.
I have found that fantasy always demands more.  It's pretty amazing how our minds have the capacity to dream, plan, ponder, and dwell on a variety of thoughts and the impact these thoughts have on us overtime.
Fantasy will always allow you to be the one most pursued, you can imagine anything your heart desires and in your lustful thoughts, it always turns out just how you like it.  This can be dangerous because allowing ourselves the freedom to fantasize creates an insatiable desire for what real people cannot fully deliver.  If we then turn to viewing porn to satisfy our lusts, seeking to fulfill our every wish through the array of porn films available, it is actually detrimental to us in a number of ways - especially over time.
...Addiction and unhealthy obsession will take away from the relationship with your spouse in the future because instead of enhancing the relationship, it will hinder progress sexually.  You will soon realize that the desire to view porn and masturbate (we do train our bodies with how we like it each time we masturbate!) overrides your interest in being intimate with your spouse, let alone fantasizing about them to the point of arousal.
I'm sure all would agree that it can be difficult to remain pure sexually in a sex-saturated world and especially to abstain from sexual acts if not married.  This is a given.
Though as Charles Stanley has said, "Your willingness to wait determines the value you place on the thing that you are waiting for."
So, what do you think?  Is training your mind and body now to respond to impure entertainment and teasing yourself through masturbation worth not having the greatest sex life possible with your future spouse because of the problems it will bring into the relationship and your life even today...or is following God's clear command for singles to stay pure before marriage (see First Thessalonians 4: 3) worth toughing it out, focusing on the Lord, and waiting as He prepares you for your future spouse and him/her for you?


Sharon Ordor said...

Absolutely spot on Emma! Great job. So encouraging. I guess when I consider one possible consequence of having a limited sex life with my husband, as well as how grieved I make the Spirit, these provide the ammunition and the persistence I need for this walk.

Emma Joy said...

Thanks, Sharon. I am grateful you can see there are consequences to our sinful indulgences and how long-term, it is better to remain sexually pure now before marriage.

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