Monday, December 2, 2013

About Pornography

Pornography and masturbation...

"What is wrong with viewing pornography?" you may ask.

  • It promotes self-satisfaction where the porn star becomes your fantasy and play toy and yet the only sex you receive from it is by your hand while delighting in the perverse thoughts of your mind and dwelling on the images you have just seen.  Or you may be in a relationship and think of a certain porn star when you are being intimate with your boyfriend or girlfriend...and yet the porn star is NOT the one you are sleeping with.

  • It makes you feel like you are in control; when in reality, you are watching other people have sex and you aren't physically a part of it.  Your computer or TV screen becomes your source of pleasure.

  • It distorts your view of sexual acts and causes you to believe that what you view in porn can actually be true of intimacy with another person.

  • It makes you a slave to sex and becomes an obsession, causing you to dwell on sexual acts more and more (where you lose control) and creates a hunger for viewing more porn - which may lead to watching hardcore pornography, violent pornography, or even child pornography.

  • It makes committing molestation or rape a REAL possibility within time, even if you can't imagine this at the beginning of viewing porn.  The more we view porn and see these images and videos, the greater appeal sex has to us.  Once masturbation gets old and you are no longer satisfied with self-gratification, you may turn to sleeping around or harming another person because you are no longer in the right frame of mind and sex has become an addiction and something you constantly think about, giving you a willingness to do almost anything in order to receive the same pleasure you once had when your addiction began.

  • It distorts your view of men and women and what you see in pornographic films becomes your standard for sexual attraction and beauty, blinding you to the reality that pornographic films are totally air-brushed, making people look perfect, enhancing certain parts of their bodies, making sex look intoxicating, and even adding sound that is totally exaggerated.

  • It affects how you act around people of the opposite (or same) gender because you do not know how to relate to people in person anymore.  Everyone becomes a sex object to you.  Your thoughts when speaking to people gravitate toward sex and hinder you from being able to have a "normal" conversation with them.

  • Your eyes and mind wander and you lack self control.

If you claim to be a Christian, a question you should seriously ponder and ask yourself is, "What makes me feel justified in viewing pornography and causes me to believe this is okay?"

As Christians, it is imperative that we walk in purity and have integrity in all our ways because we are representing our Savior to a dying (and watching) world who will find any excuse to call you a "hypocrite" and then write off your assertion of knowing the Lord as foolishness because you aren't living it.  This is not to say that Christians will not sin or even fall into sin for a time.  Yet the following statements brilliantly explain the difference:

Paul Washer said, "People don't 'fall into sin', they slide into it."

Thomas Watson said, "There is a great deal of difference between falling into a temptation and running into a temptation.  The falling into a temptation shall work for good (Romans 8: 28), not the running into it.  He who falls into a river is fit for help and pity, but he who desperately runs into it is guilty of his own death."

Charles Spurgeon said, "...It is war to the knife with my sins, not one will I keep."

As with any sin, one may desire freedom from the bondage of it, yet if you are actually serious about turning from your sin, you MUST take the necessary steps toward repentance.

Steps such as:

  • Committing your issue, struggle, temptation, sin, or problem to God and asking Him to do the necessary work on your heart, will, character, and emotions that only He is capable of in order to transform, purge, refine, purify, and sanctify you.

  • Being open and honest with trusted godly friends and mentors about the depth of your struggle and asking for prayer support, accountability, and any suggestions over resources pertaining to your particular temptation or stronghold.

  • Seeking godly counsel and bringing your problem, issue, struggle or sin to light.  (Remember the quote, "Sin thrives in secret!")

  • Removing stumbling blocks from your path.  This could mean throwing away raunchy movies, secular music with perverse or violent lyrics, not using the internet if you are home alone or by yourself at the office (and telling trusted friends or mentors about your decision with this so they can consistently ask you about it), not going to parties, clubs, bars, certain restaurants, or even family gatherings that serve alcohol, make viewing sinful entertainment accessible, or where you are surrounded by bad influences or drug use.  Nor spending time with the same friends, going to the same places, having the same conversations, or allowing yourself the "freedom" to read books, magazines, or articles that contain information that will cause you to stumble.

...These steps may seem extreme, totally legalistic, or may cause you to think, "If I stop all of this, I won't have anymore fun."

But, dear friends, is bondage, addiction, or temptation that you end up giving in to really fun?

Ask any addict if they enjoy the fun of being a slave to their addiction.  Being addicted to something, whatever that something may be, will bring inner turmoil, self-hatred, wanting to run from your own mind and desires, and even the desire to commit suicide because it might be too overwhelming to be a slave to your addiction.  There are addictions of many sorts.  It might be bondage to viewing pornography, masturbation (viewing porn will always lead to masturbation!) or drugs and alcohol.  Everyone will agree that sin is fun for a time, for a season, yet when payback arrives and you find yourself not being able to stop, what was once seen as a pleasure is now more of an enemy because you are enslaved to it.

And to quote God's word:

"...the passing pleasures of sin..."  Hebrews 11: 25

"Do not be deceived: 'Bad company corrupts good morals.' "  First Corinthians 15: 33


"Let no one say when he is tempted, 'I am being tempted by God'; for God cannot be tempted by evil, and He Himself does not tempt anyone.  But each one is tempted when he is carried away and enticed by his own lust.  Then when lust has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and when sin is accomplished, it brings forth death.  Do not be deceived, my beloved brethren."  James 1: 13-16

Romans chapter six

Psalm 119

"Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me.  Do not cast me away from Your presence and do not take Your Holy Spirit from me.  Restore to me the joy of Your salvation and sustain me with a willing spirit."  Psalm 51: 10-12

"How blessed is he whose transgression is forgiven, whose sin is covered!  How blessed is the man to whom the LORD does not impute iniquity, and in whose spirit there is no deceit!  When I kept silent about my sin, my body wasted away through my groaning all day long.  For day and night Your hand was heavy upon me; my vitality was drained away as with the fever heat of summer.  I acknowledged my sin to You, and my iniquity I did not hide; I said, 'I will confess my transgressions to the LORD'; and You forgave the guilt of my sin."  Psalm 32: 1-5

"If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness."  First John 1: 9

"Be gracious to me, O God, according to Your lovingkindness; according to the greatness of Your compassion blot out my transgressions.  Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity and cleanse me from my sin.  For I know my transgressions, and my sin is ever before me."  Psalm 51: 1-3

"Hate evil, you who love the LORD..."  Psalm 97: 10

"Therefore, confess your sins to one another, and pray for one another so that you may be healed.  The effective prayer of a righteous man can accomplish much."  James 5: 16

If you need someone to speak to about your issue with pornography, someone you can confide in, or someone to simply be kept accountable to over your struggle, you may write to me at: and I will respectfully seek to be of help in suggesting resources on the topic of pornography or by correspondence through letters and offering a listening ear.

Accountability works!


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